Monday, May 19, 2008

more quips...

I took Jake, Will and Kayla to Denver on Friday. Jake had a date with my sister, Carin, to go to the Rockies game and we decided to make a day of it and take the kids to the Denver Aquarium as well. Here I am with the kids.
And here are some fun pictures...

It's hard to take pictures at the aquarium, fish tend to move a lot. But I got a few of the non-moving attractions

Kayla liked the fish but was a bit freaked out at some of the tanks, so she wanted to be held most of the time.

Jake and Will were having fun.

On Saturday morning (yes, we kept the kids overnight!), I'm helping Kayla pack her bag. I tell her she needs to pick up both of her dirty socks. She picks up one and says, "I can't find the other one." The other one is two feet away from her in the middle of the floor. So I say, "use your eyes, Bear!" She looks around and finds the sock. A few minutes later, we are downstairs and she says, "There's a spider in Miss Carin's house." I was busy cleaning off the table so I asked her where the spider was. Her response? "Use your eyes." What a stinker!

Then, on the drive home, Will asks if we can listen to some "school" music. I told him I didn't have any. He says, "I mean the old school, like we listened to on the way to Carin's!" Yeah, I'm not telling these kids anything ever again!

Tuesday, May 13, 2008


I've come to the conclusion that limiting carbs is what is making me tired. And I'm tired of being so tired. If things go as I hope they do, I will not have the luxury of napping 3 times a week. So I'm introducing a few more carbs.

The good news? I've broken the soda habit. I have to still manage it (as with any addiction), but I can go days without it if need be. So that was one plus. (And no, I'm not in caffeine withdrawal, I've had lots of that in my tea!)

Thursday, May 01, 2008

the real danger...

My dad sent this to me and it was too good not to post. I am a member of the NRA and I am fully in support of private gun ownership. And while I know that doctors do a world of good, this puts things in perspective (something most anti-gun groups are seriously lacking!).

(A) The number of physicians in the U.S. is 700,000.
(B) The number of accidental deaths caused by physicians per year is 120,000.
(C) The number of accidental deaths per physician is 0.171.
-- Statistics courtesy of U.S. Department of Health and Human Services.

(A) The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000. (Yes, that's 80 million.)
(B) The number of accidental gun deaths per year, all age groups, is 1,500.
(C) The number of accidental deaths per gun owner is .0000188.
-- Statistics courtesy of FBI

SO, statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners.
Remember, 'Guns don't kill people, doctors do.'


Please alert your friends to this alarming threat! We must ban doctors before this gets completely out of hand! Out of concern for the public at large, I withheld the statistics on lawyers for fear the shock would cause people to panic and seek medical attention.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

I just ate...

the most delicious chicken salad sandwich ever! The bread was soft and perfect, the chicken just the right texture, and the combination of grapes, celery and bell pepper (all in a light glaze of mayo) blended like heaven.

I might have to have another!

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

quips and such...

I don't have kids. At the rate I'm going, I might not every have kids of my own. And I have to admit, I get a bit jealous when you all post the cute things your kids say. But I'm around kids all the time and I have ones that I'm very close to. Like Jake, Will and Kayla. As their mother says, "Sara would be their godmother if we were Catholic." We aren't Catholic, but I love those kids as much as I possibly can.

Lately, I've heard some fun things from the kids. Here are two highlights!

Kayla: (we were at church on Sunday, the day after my 30th birthday) "You don't look 30." I waited for the punchline, but she was just making an observation (one for which I'm grateful for!)

Mayce Jo: (Mayce is one of the girls in my nursery class on Tuesdays and Sundays, she will be 2 in June. She often talks to her mom about me. This is what she said a week or so ago as they drove to church for Tuesday morning!) "Mayce no church. Mayce no Sara. Mayce no bubbles." At this point, her mother is getting a bit concerned since Mayce loves to come see me! After a moment pause, Mayce added, "Mayce funny!"

I'm not sure if we should be concerned that Mayce Jo isn't two yet and is already using lies as a humor device, but it was cute!

Saturday, April 12, 2008

(don't tell...)

...but today is my 30th birthday!!

Thursday, March 27, 2008

not missing a beat...

Thursday is my day to cover the reception desk at church, a job I rather enjoy. This week, things were very quiet. The phone didn't ring until 9:30 or so. I answered and gave my little into. A fake-drawl says, "I was wondering if you could connect me with that tall, handsome pastor you have there." By the time she says "tall" I know this is our other receptionist, Leslie. Her husband is one of our pastors.

Without missing a beat, I replied, "I'd be happy to help you, but we have so many pastors that fit that description, I'm not sure which one to connect you with."

She bust up... what a nice way to start our morning!

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

talk about left field...

We had our monthly staff lunch for church today, an event I particularly enjoy because it is the one time a month I get to see some of the other staff. Last month, we filled out a survey about worship services (in which I was brutally honest, as usual) and had some talk time with our new pastor.

So this time, we have to take a "test" about how evangelical we are (it was a spoof). I didn't like the answers because they didn't fit. I don't know what it is about multiple choice but they never have the right answer. Since these answers were so far off, I wrote in my own. When it came to scoring time, I judged that every "d" answer (my write-ins) had to follow the scale- so I'm either super Evangelical or negative evangelical- in one case, I'm pompous in the other, I'm way heathen (more than unsaved, if that is even possible!). For some reason, this didn't surprize my fellow staff members (insert ninja smilie here!).

I guess it comes down to the fact that I'm a radical. I don't fit in a box, I don't fit people's ideas of what a Christian is. But I'm okay with that. I am just who God made me to be, and how much better can you get than that? (Not to say I can't be better, but I'm on the right track.)

And speaking of left field, baseball season starts soon. That only means (for me) that it is time of sitting on bleachers again to watch Jake. Can't wait!

Friday, February 15, 2008

reading my way through '08...

I did it in 2007 so I'm doing it again in 2008, only the goal is higher. I'm reading 100 books this year. And to complicate matters, children's books like the Narnia series don't count. Who made this silly rule? I did...

I invited the teens on CleanPlace to join me in this challenge, and to make sure they were reading quality material, the rule is no children's lit. The teens are trying their best to skirt this rule. We offered them Narnia, but only if they read all seven and count it as one. Now they want everything. But no, we are putting our feet down (we being Dianna, Sarah and I), no children's lit.

This means I have to not only read 25 more books than last year but I also have to read "harder" books as well. Not that I read simple books last year, but I did read a few short ones and a few children's (like Narnia, Island of the Blue Dolphins and Bridge to Terebithia).

Why do I do this to myself??

Sunday, February 10, 2008

another tweak...

So, my friend Dianna found a typo in my backdrop- and she was so sweet to not only fix it but to also do some tweaking. I'm so happy with the new look, I think it fits perfectly!

Not much has gone on in my world as of late. The mall is slow, but we did move the entire store in three days. Yes, we had to move to a temp location because we are getting a remodel. Moving that much product in three days took some planning, but our manager did well. And we got everything set up and looking spiffy in no time.

I recently wrote a sestina. Never heard of a sestina? Well, it is this old poetry form in which you must end each of six lines in six stanas with the same six words in different orders. Confused? No problem. Just read this and you will get the point...

Thoughts on Life

Within the turquoise swells of the ocean
lies the entrance- grasp the doorknob!
Enter- set your tea cup on a saucer
and listen to the resounding echoes,
slippery as a banana
being described by Hemingway.

Grumpy old Hemingway—
caught in the undulation of the ocean,
stuck at sea without a banana
to eat or even the security of a doorknob
to grasp—left only with the echoes
of that cup hitting the saucer.

Notice the violet rim around the edge of the saucer.
It escapes the descriptive powers of Hemingway
as it clinks empty tones that resist echoes
and sink into the restful depths of the ocean.
Cold fingers release the doorknob
and Death sits close by, eating a banana.

The moon also rises in the pale sky like a shimmering banana.
Light spills out and tumbles into the Earth’s waiting saucer.
Humanity ignores the warning signs and avoids the doorknob.
They turn to poets for answers, but only Hemingway
can ferry them across the ocean
and quiet the ever-sounding echoes.

Who’s tumbling cup set off the echoes
that ring so close? The answer slips on the peel of the banana
and follows streams back to the ocean.
All the waters pool into the saucer
that holds the tea cup set down by Hemingway
as he reaches instead for the doorknob.

Before we can enter the future we must turn the doorknob
and listen closely to the echoes
of old souls who read Hemingway
as they throw down the empty yellow shell of the banana
and return the now-washed, purple-edged saucer
to the shelf on the bottom of the ocean.

Let go of the doorknob and savor first the banana—
Make a sound that echoes in the rings of your saucer—
Recite Hemingway while crossing life’s ocean.

(c) SDD 1/31/08

Thursday, January 24, 2008

laughing and cringing...

The other day, I went through the drive-through at Taco Bell. After a long wait, I make it to the menu board to order. A young man's voice drifts over the intercom and welcomes me, then he says, "Will that be for here or to go today?". I could hear the laughter in his voice so I knew he was messing with me. I replied with, "To go would be helpful, don't you think?". He laughed and agreed with me. It was a nice little exchange. Then I waited to make it to the first window.

When I got there, another young man opens the window and starts to hand me my drink. Only problem is, he is almost palming the top of the cup where he has laid the straw across it. I can't grab the cup and the straw because his hand is in the way. He starts to let go of the cup before I've taken it. I hurry to keep the cup from falling, but I can't get the straw, which falls to the ground. So I politely ask for another straw. He grumbles something, snatches my money from my hand and slams the window closed. He takes his own sweet time to get my change, fills a water cup, grabs another straw which he lays across the cup in the same manner as before then opens the window and shoves the cup of water at me. I shake my head and say, "I only need a straw," and try to take the straw. He gets mad at me. "What?" is his gruff reply. "A straw," I said, again reaching for the straw. Finally, I grasp it and pull it out. He then proceeds to crumple my receipt before dropping my change (thankfully I got my hand up there in time to catch that) and then throws, yes, throws a bag of sauce and napkins at me before barking, "next window." I pulled forward quickly, ready to be away.

At the next window, the nice young man who took my order was waiting with my food. I was so mad I could hardly keep from crying (I cry when I'm mad...). I asked him to please tell his manager that the worker at the first window was being excessively rude and had thrown stuff at me. He was very apologetic and told me he would take care of it.

So I drove away thinking if the first young man had handled everything it would have been a very positive experience- but that the rude worker had totally ruined my lunch. And yes, it gave me indigestion...

All that to say I try to give the first sort of customer service, not the second. But there are times... I had a lady complain this week because I rung her item at the wrong price. She said it was on the 50% off table and it rang at $4. I explained that the item was on sale for $4, it wasn't on the 50% off table and that since the original price was $10.50, she had already gotten a better deal than 50% off. She kept arguing that I charged her wrong and then walked out in a huff. I was going to tell her I would be happy to re-ring it at 50% off and she could pay the additional $1.25, but she left too quickly. Some people!

Thursday, January 10, 2008

pants on fire...

I had two customers lie to me today. Right to my face. Then, they got made when the lie did not produce the expected reply (translate- I didn't give them the product for the "reduced" price). I've seen a lot of that going on during our big sale and I find it sad and rather pathetic. Honestly, half the store is being given away as it is, let's not haggle over pennies.

What is it about human nature that makes us so greedy and rude? A friend of mine is writing a computer program that has the computer ask questions of the user and then processes that info to ask more questions. He was trying to classify human behavior like greed and rudeness and decided the best way to classify those people would be in a category of jerks. I agree. And I'm okay with his program taking over the world and outlawing all jerks. (Actually, the program is going to take over the world and I get to be Princess of the Alps, the Andes, part of the Rockies, Antarctica and some tropical island, and I'm okay with that).

It is too late to think hard about this, but I am glad I can laugh about those customers (I did so with my boss, after I checked the shelves and verified the customers were lying, after they had gone of course). And I suppose they will someday get what is coming to them... or at least I hope, maybe.